Return to Grace (NJO AU)
by jadesaber2
Summary: Chapter 2 is up!!!
1.

This is my first attempt at a fanfic. In this AU, the Yuuzhan Vong are ten years late. Ben Skywalker was also born earlier.  
  
DISCLAIMERS: However much I might wish I did, I do not own Star Wars. Only two of the characters in this story are mine. The rest belong to LFL.  
  
  
  
Return to Grace  
  
He lay where he had fallen on his back, the pain more intense now that he had nothing else to distract him. He had escaped the warriors, but his ship was not waiting where it should have been, and he was badly wounded. He was bleeding from several small cuts, and a large gash in his side.  
  
He saw ships flying over the cold, lifeless field, escaping the besieged planet before the Yuuzhan Vong completed their bloody conquest. He watched as ship after ship passed through his field of vision, hoping that one pilot, any pilot, would take pity on him and land. But they flew onwards and upwards. They had seen too much death and destruction already, and were in no hurry to rescue someone who was probably going to die anyway.  
  
It was getting colder now. He tried to draw on the Force, to at least dull the pain, but he couldn't concentrate, his thoughts were too chaotic. He tried again to move. New pain lanced through his chest, forcing a cough. He tasted blood. Faintness rolled over him, and with it came the realization that he was dying. He no longer cared. He was too weary to care. He just wanted to sleep. He closed his eyes, darkness taking him, and saw her. He opened his eyes, but she was still in front of him. His wife, Tahiri. She was alive. But he knew she couldn't be. She had died years ago when an out- of-control transport had crashed into their home. He had watched, helpless, as the building collapsed around them, on top of them. His wife had been among the many casualties. His son was in a medical facility on Coruscant, in a coma. Tahiri's death had nearly driven him mad with grief.  
  
Now he was seeing her as she might have been if not for the accident. She was happy. Tahiri waved to him, beckoning him. He heard her laughter. As he listened, he realized that he wanted to die. To become one with the Force. To just close his eyes, go to sleep and never wake up. To leave this damned war to someone else. He just wanted to be with his family. He tried to smile, but he was too weak. So he sighed, and closed his eyes again. He no longer felt cold. The vision of his wife grew brighter, more real. He embraced the end of his suffering, the end of his loneliness. He was going home.  
  
"I've found him! Get me some bacta patches now! He's cut open all over!"  
  
The voice boomed in his ears. Thunder rolled over his family, and they started dissolving.  
  
"Hey, don't give up on me here. You're going to make it, just hang on."  
  
He opened his eyes to see a young face above his. He tried to tell the medic to let him go, that he wanted to die, but weakness stole his voice.  
  
"You're going to be fine. We'll have you good as new in no time."  
  
He mustered all his remaining strength and managed a whisper.  
  
"No... let me go... family... home... "  
  
But the medic kept him alive. Kept him from his family. He closed his eyes and saw them one last time before they disappeared completely. Grief and despair washed over him, and if he could, he would have wept. Then the darkness pulled him under again. 


	2. 

Anakin sat on the bed, looking out the window towards the small grassy plain and the city beyond. He ignored the sounds of the medical suite, and instead focused on the sound of the Force. Any other day, it would have been soothing, but now it reminded him of all he had lost. Sadness threatened to overtake him again. He withdrew himself from the Force.  
  
They had rescued him just before the Yuuzhan Vong cut off all hyperspace travel around the planet. He had been taken to the nearest unoccupied system for immediate medical treatment. The medical droids had healed his body, but his soul was beyond their help, weighed down by the loss of so many friends and family to the war. He closed his eyes and remembered.  
  
Jacen had died in the first wave of the invasion, several years ago. While they had disagreed strongly with each other on their views of the Force and what it meant to be a Jedi, Anakin had always respected his brother, and felt sorrow at not having told him.  
  
Then there was Chewbacca. The Wookie had been fiercely loyal to Han, and that loyalty extended to his family. He had fulfilled his life debt last year, dying to save Anakin and Leia from capture by the Vong. Anakin still felt guilty about Chewie's death, even though everyone tried to tell him it wasn't his fault.  
  
Corran Horn was the next to die, along with Elegos A'Kla. Their mission to bring the New Empire into the war had succeeded, but not before the Vong managed to destroy their shuttle. Corran's death had driven his wife, Mirax Terrik, to turn her back on the New Republic. She and some friends had taken her Star Destroyer, the Errant Venture, and disappeared into the Unknown Regions. They was still out there, supposedly building a fleet with which to strike back at the Vong. Their children, Valin and Jysella, now Jedi Knights, had mourned deeply, but had decided not to seek vengeance.  
  
Luke Skywalker had been struck down by the Yuuzhan Vong Warmaster, Tsavong Lah, during the failed defense of Ithor. He had escaped the fight, but not before being bitten and poisoned by an amphistaff. With his last words, he had passed leadership of the Jedi on to Anakin. The entire galaxy had mourned the passing of the great Jedi Master.  
  
But the most recent loss was Anakin's sister, Jaina. She had been a strong fighter, both with Rogue Squadron and with the rest of the Jedi. She had been traveling from Coruscant to Corellia with Mara when their ship had been yanked out of hyperspace by a Yuuzhan Vong interdictor. They had been boarded, and in the ensuing fight, Jaina had been captured. Somewhere between the time she was taken and the time Mara escaped in her badly damaged ship, they had all felt Jaina's presence in the Force blink out. Mara had returned to Coruscant alone and informed Han and Leia. Leia had been devastated by the loss of two children. Han had become even more withdrawn, having lost two children and his best friend to the Vong, but had stayed with Leia. Anakin knew that beneath the sunken eyes and graying hair lay a thirst for revenge that would explode eventually. He didn't want to be around when it did. He himself had tried to remain strong in the face of such personal loss, but the mounting deaths had finally broken his spirit.  
  
He opened his eyes when he heard someone behind him. He reached out with the Force, feeling Valin's presence. He did not turn around.  
  
"They're saying that you've given up."  
  
He could hear the bewilderment in the younger Jedi's voice. Anakin had been very active in fighting the Vong since the beginning of the war. He had slain more Yuuzhan Vong warriors than almost anyone, save Kyp Durron, who, with the help of his Dozen and Rogue Squadron, had attacked and destroyed a Vong worldship. Now, apparently, Anakin was walking away from the war. It made no sense to Valin.  
  
"That's right. I'm through with fighting."  
  
"If we don't fight them now, then they'll just take every system in the galaxy, star by star. Eventually, they'll take whatever planet you're on."  
  
Anakin did not respond.  
  
"Why, Anakin? You were so determined to stop them before. When we lost Yavin. What changed?"  
  
"I've grown weary of the constant death. All the pain. The suffering. The misery. It's too much for me to bear alone."  
  
"Anakin, you're not alone. We're all here to help. We miss Tahiri as much as you do. She was like a sister to all of us."  
  
"It's more than just Tahiri! It's Jacen, and Chewbacca, and Corran, and Luke, and Jaina... "  
  
Anakin's voice caught in his throat. Valin felt the intense sadness rolling off the Master.  
  
"I saw her back on the planet. I saw Tahiri. When I was waiting for the ship. She looked just like I remembered her. She was so happy. I saw her, and I just wanted to be with her again."  
  
"I feel the same way about my father, Anakin. We've all lost someone close to us. We're all just like you. Why can't you see that?"  
  
But Anakin had retreated into himself. Valin turned and walked to the door. Before he left, he turned back to Anakin.  
  
"They've taken Corellia and Duro. We think they're going to move on Bilbringi next. After that, they've got a clear path to Coruscant."  
  
Anakin's son was lying in a medical facility on Coruscant, in a coma. If Anakin reacted any way to the news, he didn't show it.  
  
"The Jedi look to you for leadership now, Anakin. What kind of example are you setting if you turn your back on them?"  
  
He strode out of the room. Things were looking more and more hopeless all the time.  
  
Anakin looked out the window. The Jedi needed him. But how could he help them if he couldn't even help himself? 


End file.
